Put a sock in it

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Put a sock in it

by EllieGant ^Pro @ 23.04.2008 – 18:05:19

How I wish that St. George had also opted to become patron saint of the washerwomen (or men). It is a complete mystery to me how I have been left with three odd socks in the time between removing them from the linen basket, washing them in a machine and then hanging them on the washing line outside. Is there a sock gremlin in the house? Do they get sucked through the holes in the washing machine thingy? Do blackbirds sneak up behind me whilst I'm hanging up the other washing and pinch them?

Slaying dragons would be child's play comparing to the ordeal of washing day in this house.
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45 Comments on Put a sock in it

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- kevinwilson ^Pro
- 23.04.2008 @ 18:07:42
i think you should knock on your neighbours doors and offer to organise a sock reunion.
it would be quite interesting if the bloke next door recognised one of his socks!
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 23.04.2008 @ 22:56:02
  Or if he opened the door and I recognised some of my underwear!
  What a ghastly idea. I'll lob the three socks over the wall now.
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- xmillyxxx ^Pro
- 23.04.2008 @ 18:11:32
One of life's mysteries!! xx
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 23.04.2008 @ 22:57:24
  It's a very annoying one - I hang on to single socks for ages, convinced that the moment I throw them away, their twin will emerge from hiding!
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- deana24
- 23.04.2008 @ 19:40:08
It's a little known fact that kitchens are epicentres of quantum physics in action. Within each washing machine, at the bottom of every washing up bowl is a gateway, to other dimensions - in space and time *sing Twilight Zone theme music - NOW!*
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 23.04.2008 @ 23:02:01
  *gets a firm grip on herself*
  
  Phew - nearly a deep space incident. I rushed in the kitchen humming the Twilight Zone tune whilst simultaneously yelling 'To infinity and beyond' and just managed to stop myself from diving head first into the washing up bowl when I belatedly realized that Buzz Lightyear don't wear socks!
  - - deana24
    - 24.04.2008 @ 08:18:04
    maybe the little people who live down the wormholes are tiny and use them as sleeping bags.
    - - EllieGant ^Pro
      - 25.04.2008 @ 13:49:39
      Then I feel really really sorry for the little wormy people if they chose my Man's socks
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- blayka
- 23.04.2008 @ 20:01:56
I swear I did not take any of your socks. Not even to make sock puppets.

And I didn't take Subville's socks either. I swear.

*pushes the pile of socks further under the bed while looking innocently at the screen*
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 23.04.2008 @ 23:03:28
  *gulps*
  
  Then that must mean that my socks have eloped with Subs and are honeymooning under your bed!
  - - EllieGant ^Pro
    - 23.04.2008 @ 23:05:18
    I meant 'eloped with Subs' socks' obviously
    
    *squints at computer screen in effort to see if Subs is hiding under Blayka's bed*
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  - - blayka
    - 24.04.2008 @ 09:00:09
    You think?
    
    Now I'm afraid to look under the bed...
    - - EllieGant ^Pro
      - 25.04.2008 @ 13:51:27
      You wouldn't be able to see her anyway, if your bed is like mine - it's a giant, undusted storage area!
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- jackfrost
- 23.04.2008 @ 20:30:30
it's the bloody sock fairy..he's related to mr nobody. the bloke who moves everything else.."who's got my book/"...nobody!!
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 23.04.2008 @ 23:07:02
  Ah ha - I knew there'd be a 'he' at the bottom of this business!
  
  *ducks*
  - - jackfrost
    - 24.04.2008 @ 04:31:26
    Ah!!! So its the "ducks"....right thanks for that..now where are you you little B.....
    - - EllieGant ^Pro
      - 24.04.2008 @ 11:00:05
      But it could be wood pigeons - I just saw one try to land on the washing line, the feathered fiend!
      - jackfrost
        
        24.04.2008 @ 11:07:53
        
        but i have just duffed up a load of ducks..now yer telling me they were not the guilty ones??? shish!!
        
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        EllieGant ^Pro
        
        24.04.2008 @ 11:27:49
        
        It's not my fault you went quackers!
        
        Did the ducks give you the bird, then?
        
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        jackfrost
        
        24.04.2008 @ 11:34:50
        
        Nah They were all full of sh.......
        
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- sula36 ^Pro
- 23.04.2008 @ 20:53:40
maybe sock manufacturers build in a dissolving agent into one sock of most pairs. Then in the washing machine, one dissolves. So we have to buy some more. Very cunning
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 23.04.2008 @ 23:11:25
  Now that is a really clever theory - so clever that I want to immediately test it by safety-pinning two socks together and seeing what happens!
  - - sula36 ^Pro
    - 24.04.2008 @ 19:12:29
    ok, let me know what happens
    mind you, it won't be every pair. That would arouse our suspicions.
    - - EllieGant ^Pro
      - 25.04.2008 @ 13:52:33
      I believe you - they never target the tatty old ones. Just the brand-new pairs!
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- tylluanpenry ^Pro
- 23.04.2008 @ 21:18:56
Homer is fascinated with socks. Every so often he runs into the washroom and grabs one, then takes it away and hides it.

I suspect if you are having problems with socks you should try asking your house-brownie where he is putting them....
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 23.04.2008 @ 23:12:46
  .. Or asking Dog to confess what was in that hole I caught her digging in the garden this afternoon!
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- Tentativeplotfinder
- 23.04.2008 @ 22:28:35
I did suggest a sock-meet a while ago when I last had a bad case of Missing Socks, I believe I blamed it on the Behind the Washing Machine Gremlin, but it turned out to be the Rucksack Gremlin instead.
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 23.04.2008 @ 23:15:23
  It's usually the Weekend Bag or Gym kit Gremlin - but neither have been allowed out recently. So it is a total mystery!
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- Tentativeplotfinder
- 23.04.2008 @ 22:30:17
http://saints.sqpn.com/pst00418.htm will find you five options!!
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 23.04.2008 @ 23:23:26
  I think I'll choose St Clare of Assisi. Or maybe St Hunna. I'd feel too guilty about adding missing socks to the woes of the others!
  - - Tentativeplotfinder
    - 24.04.2008 @ 12:08:07
    I was a bit bemused as to why Clare, but she has some fairly diverse things she's patron of, including TV.
    
    I'm more inclined to Martha, myself.
    - - EllieGant ^Pro
      - 25.04.2008 @ 13:55:32
      I think the attraction was that Clare seemed to have an unusually pain-free and stress-free existence for a saint!
      - Tentativeplotfinder
        
        25.04.2008 @ 15:39:19
        
        I kind of agree on the level that she doesn't have some of the over-dramatics of other saints, but life in an enclosed community is no stress or pain free existence. Shut up with all those women for 40 or so years.....
        
        I need to go and lie down to recover from the mere thought.
        
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- MissyMouse
- 23.04.2008 @ 23:49:23
Call for the sock police.....and get them to pop round to mine after too please
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 24.04.2008 @ 10:52:13
  I did - but all Jack could suggest was that fairies were responsible!
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- rowtheboat ^Pro
- http://rowtheboat.blog.co.uk/
- 23.04.2008 @ 23:53:37
The sock thief is indeed a mystery.

Apart from Mjohnson, of course, who cunningly hypnotises people ia blog into mailing him their socks. Beware...
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 24.04.2008 @ 10:55:49
  *stares anxiously at husband for signs of hynopsis*
  
  Hmmmm. By the sound of it, Mjohnson must have a rather fine collection by now then ...
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- rubychoo
- 24.04.2008 @ 00:33:35
I'll opt for St Hunna then :

'noblewoman surrounded by linens; washing clothes for the poor and sick'...

That's so me that is...

(22 odd socks today)
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 24.04.2008 @ 10:58:46
  If you have attempted to wash 22 pairs of socks in one day, then you surely are a saint.
  
  My strategy from now on is to buy the same coloured socks so they can be matched with other MIAs. Shame that my husband will look so stupid going to work in pink, but that's the price you have to pay for domestic harmony.
  - - rubychoo
    - 30.04.2008 @ 00:45:05
    I am a Saint...
    
    Ask anyone...
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- loiswakeman
- http://lois.co.uk
- 24.04.2008 @ 13:58:24
We have two strategies chez Wakeman.

1. Socks must be paired by the cuff before they go into the laundry box. I eventually managed to train the kids to do this too. They are washed in pairs and only separated on the line if they haven't already come adrift.

2. Hubby (who gets though far more than I do) buys about 20 pairs the same so any odds can be kept for when the next one goes MIA. I have lots of odd ones and don't care - I wear odd earrings too!

Despite this, we still get the 'odd odd'. They can be used to make camera beanbags, stretchy ties for plants, strainers for old chip fat, and many other things, I am sure. I recycled some of my daughter's little girl socks by stuffing gathered strips with old sleeping-bag filling, as bobbles for my whacky peg bag. The worlds is your mollusc with some old socks in the mending bag!

Oh, and if you can, do read "Hugo and Oddsock"" - charming and funny, even for grown-ups. Such a shame it's no longer in print.
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 25.04.2008 @ 13:59:43
  Now I'm feeling rather guilty - because my husband does pair all his socks. He was brought up with four elder sisters and is immaculately house-trained! I'm the culprit sock-separator.
  
  I'll try and get that books - sounds fun. But I think I'll draw the line at using a sock as a chip fat strainer - the image of cheesy wotsits sprang to mind!
  - - loiswakeman
    - http://lois.co.uk
    - 25.04.2008 @ 15:02:05
    Eurch - I did mean a clean sock!
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- mycorneroftheworld
- 24.04.2008 @ 20:18:26
It happens to me as well! I do think they must go out with the dirty water or something!
- - EllieGant ^Pro
  - 25.04.2008 @ 14:00:53
  That's what I think - surely otherwise you'd find them lurking under the bed or in the linen basket!
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